She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
