i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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