You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
