operation harelip BJ is a go
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Semen is not good for contacts.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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