I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
found the other keg... it's in the tree
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
