Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (253): Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life. http://tfl.nu/h3s9
  Replies (33) Good night (4965) Bad night (1302)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant (617): then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him. http://tfl.nu/q2li
  Replies (6) Good night (941) Bad night (3776)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  there is no way he can be that small

  (1-419): View more from Ohio

  look on the bright side he'll over comepensate

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): there is no way he can be that small (1-419): look on the bright side he'll over comepensate http://tfl.nu/8mfj
  Replies (18) Good night (716) Bad night (2661)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (972): The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid? http://tfl.nu/xjdi
  Replies (15) Good night (751) Bad night (3363)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you. http://tfl.nu/6q4j
  Replies (14) Good night (9358) Bad night (1092)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B. http://tfl.nu/ianl
  Replies (28) Good night (1282) Bad night (6049)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings? http://tfl.nu/0565
  Replies (28) Good night (3139) Bad night (1186)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday. http://tfl.nu/lawx
  Replies (14) Good night (3134) Bad night (1077)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"... http://tfl.nu/nha2
  Replies (18) Good night (1153) Bad night (6483)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (774): Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day http://tfl.nu/bsus
  Replies (4) Good night (1505) Bad night (801)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being." http://tfl.nu/i99y
  Replies (7) Good night (764) Bad night (1155)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (574): He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle. http://tfl.nu/u8g2
  Replies (4) Good night (397) Bad night (1132)
• Favorite

  (830): View more from Texas

  Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (830): Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old. http://tfl.nu/rc4y
  Replies (0) Good night (633) Bad night (402)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (858): Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station. http://tfl.nu/uxsr
  Replies (1) Good night (597) Bad night (315)
• Favorite

  (438): View more from Quebec

  the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (438): the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love http://tfl.nu/1vr2
  Replies (0) Good night (775) Bad night (219)

Randomize