Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
