Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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