I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
