trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
