Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
