i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
don't judge my taste in strippers
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
