I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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