Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize