Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
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