okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
As shirtless as possible
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
