Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
