Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
