no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
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