Porn is love you can see.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
MIDGETS
????
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize