I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
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