I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
