i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
