So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
