Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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