We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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