Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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