She went from zero to smokin in five shots
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
