remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize