4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Sex in the backyard? Check.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize