I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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