I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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