What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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