Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Randomize