have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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