Sorry, I don't speak sober.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
