So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize