well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize