i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Randomize
