I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
