Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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