New low: just hacked my moms facebook
babies were throwing up all over the place
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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