Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Randomize