she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
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