Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
