I don't usually arrange sex via text message
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
