he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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