he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
You took a bar mat shot.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Edward fifth and chaser hands
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
