after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Randomize
