apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
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I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
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WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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