so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
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