As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
